It really is a fitting title though. Here we are on the eve of 33 weeks. Made it yet another week and I feel like the "Little Engine That Could." Every day I'm chanting inside, "I think I can, I think I can...." And...I do, so that's good I guess!
What a complete whirlwind the last week or so has been. Friday night I was frustrated to discover that the wonderful twin travel system (complete with 2 car seats, 4 bases and a large double stroller) we were given for free by a family with twins.....was recalled. Lovely. Of course I had to wait until 3 weeks before the twins arrive to realize this...not the ideal time to go hunting for a new double car seat/stroller combo....considering a 10 minute trek in Walmart leaves me breathless and couch-bound... Also not so great on the bank account.
Have to interject here how incredibly blessed we have been during this pregnancy. From diaper showers to encouragement and prayers to packages arriving unexpectedly to meals sent home from coworkers to cards packed with gift cards, we have been truly blessed. Not 30 minutes after realizing we were going to need to spend $350 on two car seats and a stroller, we opened a few gifts and were speechless to discover more than $200 in gift cards! What an answer to prayers we didn't even pray! That is kind of how the whole pregnancy has gone - just people providing the strength, encouragement and support we needed (physical, emotional and financial)! So so thankful to everyone.
Fast forward to Saturday. Ended up at Target with the fam to investigate car seat options. Mom refused to let me walk around so I got to navigate the aisles in the charming beeping motor carts. (Again an engine reference - Briggs & Stratton!) Oh yes, that was me. Big old preggo on a cart, humiliated, and hoping not to see anyone I knew. Walked out of Target a bit poorer but equipped with two perfect car seats for this growing family. Not thrilled that we had to buy them but happy the boys will be safe and we are ready with car seats for them to go in! Stroller is on order from Walmart and should arrive by next Friday.Another fun weekend with the parents - much less work and just a few things to get done. My dad installed a light in the baby closet (I swear this wasn't even on my list!) and he put up the baby gate too. Mom cleaned my house, finished laundry and just took care of the house stuff that is physically almost impossible for me. Ben tolerated my nesting and moved/organized some boxes without complaining. :) All in all, successful and not too physically difficult weekend.
Then we have the work week. I decided at the end of last week to cut back and only work 7am - Noon this week since I've been steadily having contractions every afternoon and the only thing that helps is laying down for a bit. Well today I worked until 1:15pm and then headed to my doctor's appointment. Not really a break, and BOY I am feeling it now at 8pm. Regardless, I hope to actually stick with the Noon departure this week to avoid much more of those "Briggs & Stratton" rumblings.
VERY eventful doctor's appointment today. My "little engine that could" was feeling less confident than usual going into today. I knew this appointment would be a long one. Start of surveillance, monitoring both babies, full growth ultrasound and appointment with the specialist. I ended up being there for almost 2.5 hours. I always have a small amount of worry inside before they take my blood pressure and in the few moments before we see both babies moving and heartbeats. But today really put me through the ringer.
Arrived to the appointment out of breath, moving slow and feeling tired. Shuffled into the vitals room and was elated to hear that my blood pressure CONTINUES to remain good. 128/70 and I'm avoiding preclampsia, thankfully. Then I was ushered into a new room for the surveillance and monitoring. Never done this part before, and I was really wishing Ben could have been there to calm my nerves and pep talk me through it. ;) I'm a big girl though, and I managed it alone. Not without a serious amount of anxiety....
They hooked me up to the monitors - one for Baby A, one for Baby B, and one for me to measure potential contractions. And off we went. All they had told me at this point was that they try for 20 minutes to get a good reading on these babies. After those 20 minutes, the nurse came back in and that's when the worry started. Baby A was doing great and cooperating exactly how they wanted. Baby B...not so much. Heart rates weren't dropping or anything crazy, but Baby B wasn't demonstrating enough "activity" or increased heart rate for a certain interval of time within the 20 minute window. So began the nurse coming in every 5 minutes checking, tearing off the chart, showing the specialist and coming in again. She tried to wake up Baby B with some kind of acoustic/vibrating tool on my tummy (weird!) and again she kept coming to check. Never really sure what was going on, I was a little less than happy and confident at this point. All this combined with the fact that once I was sitting still for that long and watching the monitors, I realized I was DEFINITELY having contractions. Great. They were just at the very top of my huge belly and didn't hurt, but they definitely were contractions. The nurse commented on that also, but didn't really give any "that's okay" or "that's normal" vibes. All in all, this first time of monitoring process was super stressful. After a full hour they stop the monitoring. Right at the very end I guess Baby B cooperated finally and she said both babies "passed" the test. Um...okay? Then she proceeds to tell me what would have happened if they HADN'T passed. I guess that they use a points system for each baby when monitoring. If they don't get enough points during the monitoring, then you have to go through a specific type of ultrasound that equates to 30 minutes with each baby. If they still don't get enough points that way, then you do not pass the 'test' and have to repeat the entire process the very next day to ensure the babies are active/healthy/etc. Whew. So, my babies passed....but I was still left with a very uneasy and worried mind....is Baby B okay even though it took him so long to pass the test? Are these contractions I suspected but now actually confirmed going to mean #1 No Work or worse...#2 Admittance to the Hospital? Ugh. Worry!!!!!! But of course the only person who can answer these questions is the maternal fetal specialist who I didn't see for another HOUR. That's right...went straight from the monitoring to my growth ultrasound. Different tech than normal and my poor belly and babies were just beat (literally!) by this point from prodding and moving. Ultrasound was pretty painful and just blah. Found out the babies are 9oz different in size, which is much more than last time, so that was yet another concern weighing on my mind.
Fast forward again and I am sitting in the consultation room waiting for the specialist and anxious for what I'm about to hear. And then....he comes in. And he is the most calm, encouraging and no-nonsense doctor ever. He goes through the whole list of things, my concerns, and what they found. And....we're all good...well great actually! Crazy. It was really kind of funny....in a non laughing way...Apparently it is completely normal for the monitoring to take an hour, and sometimes the babies just won't even cooperate or the monitors themselves don't stay on to get a good reading, etc. So actually my babies did really well! I guess that at 33 weeks, the babies aren't necessarily big enough to demonstrate exactly what they want to see on the monitors, so he completely expected what happened and was thrilled that both babies did actually pass the test the first time....basically what I saw as a concern he was happy about. Good grief. I talked to him of course about the contractions. He assured me they were Braxton Hicks and that I'd probably be having lots more of them as we progressed. Well, okay then! No worries there, check. (However I do have to watch it and make sure they don't become painful, very regular and/or progress to lower abdomen and back cramping. I brought up work and he said that there is no reason I cannot continue working - he himself said that every day I can work now is another day I can be home with then, and I'm having NO preterm risks whatsoever. Nothing I'm doing at work is affecting these babies in a bad way. As long as I continue to listen to my body and rest when I need it, I am good to go for the duration. Whew. So my plan remains to finish this week 7am - Noon and re-evaluate for next week. Hoping still to make it until October 28 at work if I physically can! Shocked that the doc was so encouraging with work. That conversation actually led to a labor discussion. The doctor, on his own, said that I am almost to the point where they wouldn't stop my labor if I did actually start...I supposed that 34 weeks is that milestone. Then he proceeded to tell me that since I got the lung steroid shots two weeks ago he doubts they will stop labor even if I went now!!!! GEEZ!!!! He literally said that he doesn't have concerns for these babies - they are healthy and will be fine if born now. (Granted, they would still need NICU time, but he is very happy with their developmental maturity at this point).
Sorry to keep you waiting for the best news at all....these babies are both over 4 pounds! Can you even believe it???? Yes, I have almost 9 pounds of baby in me right now. Considering Sam was born at 39 weeks weighing 5lb 10oz, these are big babies!!! Baby A is 4lb 2oz and Baby B is 4lb 11oz. The doctor said some of that difference in size (that I was of course worried about when the ultrasound tech told me) is ultrasound error and they are around 10% different in weight - anything under 20% difference they consider nomal and healthy. So we are good!!! AND BIG. YAAAAHOOOO!
So I walked out of the doctors office after more than two hours of stress with a huge weight lifted and elated that these babies are over 4 pounds each. Scheduled the remainder of ALL my appointments in the next three weeks and breathed another sigh of relief. I will probably not have another growth ultrasound before the babies are born so this is the last marker we will have about how big they will be when born. They have grown about a pound each in the last month, so we can expect them (if I make it to November 8) to be just under or around 5 pounds probably. That is AMAZING! Again, my original goal this whole pregnancy was hoping for babies that were 4 pounds. I am so happy!!!!!!!
What a complete rollercoaster of emotions today. And so...here we are. 33 Weeks. Chugging right along. And the little engine that could....can. And will. Another day down. Just a little more weight to pull and a little more slowly. But soon on the other side I will be saying, I thought I could...and did. Looking forward to that day.
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