The Goal

I like goals. Not news to many. It's pretty much my thing.

As an example I made a list 20 lines long on Friday night. Sam spent the weekend in STL for a little one-on-one attention time with the grandparents and I knew we needed to take advantage of the baby naps to get some things accomplished. How thrilled was I to discover last night before crashing that all but 2 things were checked off!

Goals are great. A guide. A marker. A milestone to reach.

That's why when I subconsciously set a sleep goal many moons ago I thought surely by 6 months old, these babies would be drifting into la la land and staying there for the standard 10-12 hours a night. Not so much. One week away from having 6 month old twins and I am still only getting about 6 hours of sleep a night. Ouch. They normally wake once...or twice. And the occasional 10 times a night (oy vey!)

And so....since my sleep goals have died a painfully slow unmerciful death, I have restored this weekend to set another goal. 20 days until I turn 30. 2.9 pounds to lose and I will officially be back to my pre-twins weight. I really want to make it by my birthday, and I figure posting it on here will at least force me to think twice...or three or four times...before downing the cupcakes. Or candy. Or muffins. Eeek. I love food.

I started my Saturday off with a 3am wake up call followed by four hours of baby crying and after the first morning feeding I headed off to the gym for really the first time in almost a year. I quit my membership last March when I found out I was pregnant but I really need to do some hard core cardio to whip away those last 3 pounds. So to the non-membership freely accessible indoor track I go. Proud to say I ran a whole mile! I couldn't believe how great it felt. I am not a runner. Never liked it. But in college I ran a daily 5-10K. Seriously. I look back on that time (and my 115lb physique along with a size 2 wardrobe) with disbelief. I don't know how I did it. I certainly don't have the time to devote to that kind of exercise now. And I had much more food resolve then. Why? Who knows.

I am never going to be 115lb again. I'm okay with that. I'm going for a solid 130. Yes, that's right. I just did it. Committed the No No. I said my goal weight out loud. So if you are keeping track that is 130 by 30. Ironically I'm sitting at 133. Which is good! Don't get me wrong. This is my exact weight before I got pregnant with Sam pretty much exactly 5 years ago. Not too shabby after having three kids! BUT. I was 130 on the dot before becoming a cooker for two babies. And I want to get there again. Heck, even a little lower than that would be nice. Never again will I see below 125 I'm thinking....I can't sacrifice my sweets.

Hardest part for me in this goal is not snacking on crap food. Since I went back to work, I've tried to be consistent about taking my lunches. Wraps or PB&J are on the menu most days, and I think if I really stick to that for the next few weeks I can do this! So, please say a prayer and do a cheer.

I had several goals to reach before I was 30 and I might actually shed some happy tears if I can make this particular one happen in 20 days. And yes, this does mean I will be pigging out on May 8....what else are birthdays for???